Billy Hargrove

FUNNY EXCERPT FROM: THE WHISTLEBLOWER with Steve Harrington

[...] Sometime later, while Steve and Lucas were inside, Billy claimed his rightfully earned seat (throne) atop the elevated lifeguard chair. He actually took his responsibility quite seriously, but the majority of him just wanted to fuck with everyone else at this point.

T W E E T !

"No breathing outside of the water!"

TWEET!

"HEY! No excessive splashing! That's more than three inches!"

TWEET!

SINCLAIR! Treat the pool noodles with RESPECT! No verbal abuse of inflatable equipment!"

TWEET !

"No drowning where I can't see you, Buckley! Anyone caught drowning dramatically must do it somewhere the lifeguard can supervise!"

TWEET!

"No unauthorized marine wildlife, Byers! You bring a shark into this pool, you better have a permit!"
"It's a floatie!" Will proclaimed.

Promptly, Billy put the whistle between his teeth and tweeted loudly again.

"NO ARGUING WITH POOL AUTHORITIES!"

A minute later, while Lucas and Steve were inside, Robin and Will had the absolute audacity to load up their Nerf guns and shoot water at each other. It took no less than two seconds for—

TWEET!

"No unauthorized weapons! Fill out the damn paperwork first!"
"It's a Nerf gun, Billy!" Robin laughed. She rolled her eyesmore than once at Billy's increasingly ridiculous regulations, but knowing he was only messing around, she couldn't help laughing along every time.

"What did I say about arguing with the lifeguard?!" Billy shouted back, the grin permanently plastered across his mouth.

Robin grinned, looking at Will. Will grinned back.

"Follow my lead," she whispered. 

And with that, both of them climbed out of the pool, weapons loaded and ready, and made a beeline for the lifeguard chair. Billy's eyes widened behind his pilot sunglasses, a sudden look of panic flashing across his face.

"Oh HELL no!"

Billy pulled his knees up and hurried to get his whistle ready, but it was already too late. Robin and Will unleashed a merciless barrage of water bullets straight at his face, screaming, shouting, and laughing their hearts out. Meanwhile—

T W E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E T !

Billy's attempts to call for help dissolved into a series of gurgling noises as his whistle filled with water yet again. He coughed, sputtered, and tried desperately to shield his face, but to no avail. Robin and Will showed absolutely no remorse, keeping up their attack until their guns finally ran dry and Billy was given a chance to breathe again. But instead of complaining or inventing yet another set of pool regulations, the lifeguard simply threw his hands in the air and burst out laughing. His hair was a complete disaster, and he looked like the wettest, most pathetic poodle in the world.

"OKAY, OKAY, OKAY! I SURRENDER! HAVE MERCY!"

Robin and Will cheered, exchanging a triumphant high-five. Billy climbed down from his chair, shaking his head at the two of them.

"That, my friends, was a fuckin' ambush."

The two offenders merely shrugged, still grinning all over their faces as "Cruel Summer" by Bananarama played in the background.

"So, is your shift ended?" Robin asked. Billy sighed. 
"... Yeah, yeah, fine. I'll stop. But please be careful, alright?"

He cringed when they jumped into the pool by the edge, but decided to let it slide. The sun would dry their wet footprints faster than anyone could say 'pool regulations', so he was hopeful no one was going to slip anytime soon. 

Before grabbing a towel to dry his hair, he hung the whistle back on the lifeguard chair to dry, an amused smile still lingering on his face. [...]