Eddie Munson I ST

"Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to be a smartass… the idea is cute. Nightmare world, broken memories, a bad guy with a god complex ..  that’s how I started out too, classic rookie GM move. But buddy… you have no sense of structure, you’re throwing twists on the table like dice and hoping something six-ish will come out of it. But that’s not how it works... if everything is supposed to be constantly surprising, then at some point it just becomes… loud, confusing, and way too complex for anyone to follow. And now I’m stuck here, inside one of your memories that pretends to be real. You want me to accept it...to let myself be fooled and play along, too bad I’m the guy who actually knows the rules. My death wasn’t a bad move... very tragic, very bloody, and I even felt heroic. But if you just send me back now, like nothing happened, then you’re ripping up your own rulebook. You know what my friends would see? Definitely no redemption, no miracle, because after what they’ve been through for years, you don’t believe in miracles anymore. They’d just see the guy who’s supposed to be dead and they’d be scared, they’d distrust me. It’s not even high drama, but some of them are way too logical for that to work right away.

I’m strong as hell(fire)now, yeppers. I’m chaotic… completely unhinged, apparently. I can yell at your monsters and they run away. An Eddie Munson upgrade, but I can’t just crawl out of the grave like it’s some fucking trick up my sleeve... That would be cheap... and waaaaay too god-mod.

So here’s the deal, great architect of fu.. *gasp* ..tility ..  and I know you can hear me. Either you give me a reward, proper rules, a damn reason, or loot to upgrade myself with. I know my strengths, and I know exactly which skill trees I’d invest in. Or I’ll sit right here.. laugh my ass off, and point out every single plot hole until even your nightmares, memories, and parallel worlds stop giving a shit about you anymore. Because I got it,  tadaaa... myystery solved, at least one of them.... a pretty big one. And you hate nothing more than a player who realizes the dungeon is fake. Was the world unfair to you? Dramatic starting point... the textbook way to create a villain, but your concept isn’t polished, it’s a cliché, one that’s been used in an infinite number of campaigns and keeps showing up in half-baked missions. Oh, and one more thing. While you’ve been cobbling together worlds, the other players out there actually went through a transformation. Real buttass character development, the kind of stuff that makes characters powerful."