Billy Hargrove's Diary | Spring 1986 | Stranger Things 4.5

Woke up 2 days ago. During that earthquake

Dr. Kay says I should write how I feel every day and gave me this calendar. I think she's full of shit

Fine. I'm tired. I want to throw up. My back hurts. My shoulder hurts. My chest hurts. Everything hurts
I hate hospitals
I hate birthdays

Happy ?

I think I'm 19 now. Had to ask someone

Max is here. In the hospital

Still not waking up

Asked to see her
Not yet , they said.  Fucking bullshit

Speech therapy sucks

I can barely speak. Can't cuss

can't tell them to fuck off

They keep asking if I remember things .

I wish they'd stop
Sometimes I do
Sometimes I wish I didn't

Writing  hurts

I don't like Dr. Kay . don't care if she reads this

Power went out a few times today. Annoying

Nurse told me I was getting another blood draw.

April fools

Then Dr. Kay actually ordered one an hour later

Should've known

Asked to see Max again. They said no.
No April Fools this time. Assholes

Tried walking today. Legs don't feel like mine.

Nearly hit the floor multiple times

physical therapy sucks even more than speech therapy

Mirror

Bad idea

Susan came . It was awkward. She looked sick.
She talked a lot. Then she said that my Dad divorced her last year and left her and Max with nothing

 GO   TO   FUCKING   HELL   DAD  ! !

        FUCK   YOU !

I know he was here once while I was gone

                    ONCE

       and then never again
Of course he ran when it mattered

                like all parents do

They let me see Max today .
She's so quiet. Not at all annoying . She would tell me how ugly I look . I would tell her to fuck off.
Her arms and legs are broken. She's wearing a neck brace. Her eyes look weird.

Everybody keeps telling her she'll wake up. They talked to me like that too. Wondering if she can hear them. If she knows I was there. I said her name. Nothing . I held her hand for a minute. Felt weird. It was cold. Like she's already gone 

Told her she still owes me for scratching my Camaro. Stupid thing to say. Susan said the car is on the junkyard now. I think Harrington crashed into it that night ? 

Have to stop writing.   Hand hurts

I'm sorry Max