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Genre: Romance/EroticBanterGenre: Sci-Fi/Futuristic/CyberpunkGenre: Supernatural/Occult/ParanormalRated - ModerateWriting - MSL
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Banter RepostStranger ThingsStranger Things 4.5Billy HargroveSteve Harringtonoops shit is hitting the fanmaybe
Co-authors
Fabulous Killjoy
| HAWKINS FAMILY VIDEO ARCHIVE // BEST VIEWED ON PC | TAPE 04 | ||||
| NOW PLAYING
Should I Stay or Should I Go? STRANGER THINGS 4.5 // 1986 |
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| ← PREVIOUS CHAPTER » SURPRISE ME | |||||
| Steve and Billy set out for something simple—a drink, loud music, the illusion of an ordinary guys’ night. For a few fleeting moments, it almost feels normal. No monsters. No memories clawing at their heels. Just clinking glasses and flying darts. But normal was never meant for them.
Before the night can settle into something easy, two soldiers step through the bar doors and make their way straight to Billy. Their message isn’t a request. It’s a summons. And whatever they want, it’s clear this isn’t just about a drink gone wrong.  |
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| [ ... ]
“Well... um... you said that girls might not look at you anymore and stuff. And you know I think that's nonsense. Do you plan on having fun again sometime, or is that out of the question for you because of the situation? I don't know... I think I'm just at an age where I don't want to give that up... flirting and stuff, even though it's become difficult in a city that still knows me as I once was... apart from that, I seem to have really forgotten how to flirt.” He was 19 years old... he had left puberty behind, but he was a young guy in the so-called prime of his life, and somehow he didn't want to let go of that completely. Normality... normal topics now and then... something that nourished hope and symbolized what he was missing. |
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| It was strange to be back at a bar, and Billy needed a few moments to get used to the noise but once he did, it turned into something so familiar, something easy to start with. He ordered a strong beer for Steve and a glass of still water for himself. He didn't want to end up with an upset stomach again, but instead start lightly, tread carefully. Perhaps, he could have a sip from Steve's drink just to get used to it, but he wouldn't ask just yet.
Billy put on a half-embarrassed smile. It felt strange, but also good to talk about regular man-things again. "Yeah, no, I'm not really into that stuff right now. I've got other shit on my mind, but... y'know, at some point when I feel better... maybe? And thanks for the compliment, man, really... But I'm not what I used to be, and I'm not gonna pretend that I am. I don't care if any girls still smile and wave at me. They just see what they wanna see." He leaned forward on the table and looked at Steve, grinning again. "You don't have to give that up. And honestly, Harrington, I don't think you forgot how to flirt. I just think... you're a bit... detached from what you really want because you're worrying about other shit all day. So... What do you really want? Not what you think you should want because you're young and in the prime of your life. And not what you think other people want. I mean the real deal — your real deal. There can be nothing wrong with what you want, doesn't matter what it is. But once you know... you'll be much more certain with yourself." Billy squinted his eyes faintly, challenging him a little. |
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| Of course, these bars weren’t as unfamiliar to Steve as they were to Billy; the blond had to get used to all this again. Steve was used to it because when he wasn’t trying to save the world with his friends, he would retreat to these very bars, trying to distract himself and avoid the temptation to give up. He wasn’t a drinker, not at all, but a beer now and then couldn’t hurt. He had chosen a table where they could be undisturbed, a little away from the other people who were also seeking mental refuge in these bars. Men’s conversations, exactly... that was the goal now. Steve wanted to get to know Billy better, in different scenarios, in different situations, and he really wanted it... really wanted it from the bottom of his heart. And not just for Max anymore, but also for himself.
“I just thought... that what was a habit for you back then might free you from some dark thoughts.” But even as he said it, Steve realized that he was actually just trying to pass on his own coping mechanism to Billy. What helped him didn’t necessarily have to help others. “Sure, cool attitude... but I don’t think all girls are the same and only see what they want to see. There will also be some who are interested in getting to know who you want to be, you know? But I can understand that you’re not interested in any of that right now.” When his beer arrived, he picked up the glass and took a sip, but he didn’t put it down when Billy spoke to him. Instead, he kept drinking, his eyes widening slightly as he used the glass as a mask, so to speak, because he thought he could hide behind it. Only when he had almost finished the strong brew did he put the glass down and wipe the foam from his lips. You could tell something was going on in his brain... Steve was actually really easy to read. “Holy moly, Gandalf... I didn’t think you were capable of saying anything or asking questions that contained subtle allusions that require a certain degree of intelligence to understand and analyze. Eh... no offense.” The corners of his mouth twitched slightly, but... he found it difficult to respond. Hm.... what did he actually want? “I don’t know what I want.” He finally said, which was only a half-truth. “Well, actually I do... but it’s not relevant in these times. As you said... it’s... well... we have other things to worry about. Maybe I’m just a dreamer in a world that’s been torn apart, trying to create my own... a safe space.” And again, he had revealed something he usually vehemently protected from others. Why was he opening up to Billy? Why him, of all people? “Want to play a round of darts? Or pool?” 
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| "Sure, but it... doesn't feel the same, you know?"
And he wasn't just talking about a potential love life. It was everything. Everything felt different now. Like someone rewired his entire body and brain and completely fucked it up. Billy put on a rather flattered smile afterwards. "Well, there's... not much to know about me or who I want to be, really. Right now it's all just..." He waved his hand trying to find the right word and sighed. "It's whatever." The truth was that he didn't want there to be much. It only meant being seen, being figured out completely, and Billy didn't like that thought. Plus, his scars covered his entire lower torso, and they were so deep and discolored that he could never bring himself to look at them in the mirror. If he found his own body so revolting, how could anyone want to be with him? Billy wasn't sure if Steve was being naive in his kindness, or just straight up dumb; And yet, he didn't want to blame him. Steve hadn't seen his scars, at least not completely. So how would he know? Billy had been a real heartbreaker back then, picking up anyone he found attractive enough for his non-existent standards, and once he'd gotten what he wanted, he would move on and hit on the next target. It used to make him feel like a rockstar. Now... thinking back on it, contemplating to do it again, filled him with a tightness he found hard to shake off. Thankfully, Steve's obvious avoidant drinking made him smile a bit, although the guy's following comment had him very confused for a moment. "Who's Gandalf? Also, fuck off, I had straight A's in biology. Did you have straight A's in biology? Don't think so," he teased. Still, Billy listened attentively, his gaze fixed on Steve's pretty brown eyes when he talked. The clockworks were ticking wildly inside that head, he knew it; And somehow, he was dying to figure him out, to find out what all those little gears were made of. "I see... Well... This is where I think you're wrong. It's always relevant what you want, even if times are hard. And if you need a little distraction from that, y'know, a little fun... Why not go for it? Remember when I told you a pretty boy like you has nothing to worry about? Yes, yes, I know I was being a fucking douche when I said that to you ages ago. I was just trying to rile you up. But I still think it's true." Then, he grinned at the offer. "Sounds good. Let's do it," he said and got up, taking some swigs from his water. Billy hadn't realized how parched he really was. Perhaps it was just due to the company he was keeping. |
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| “Man... you were possessed by a flesh monster and then torn to pieces... I don’t think that will ever completely go away. I mean... what changed you. None of us will ever be the same again. Basically, we just have to make sure we keep fighting... and don’t lose ourselves.”
It was so easy to say all that, to try to sugarcoat everything, but it was anything but sugarcoated. However, there was no time to lose, not yet... not now. “...Right now, it’s all just a shitty nightmare you can’t wake up from, or even tell if it’s real or not? True story, I used to love horror movies, but today Michael Myers seems like a joke compared to what’s happening here.” Steve was actually both sometimes... naïve and stupid. Naïve because he clung to the hope that everything would get better, and stupid... stupid because he sometimes wanted to be stupid, because it was easier to get through everything that way. But what he said about Billy, he meant seriously. Scars, a disfigured body.. that was certainly terrible for the person affected... but it wouldn’t bother him in someone else, not if he had taken them into his heart. He also had a few ugly scars from the attacks of the so-called Demo Bats, and was he satisfied with himself? Well... not entirely. But he could understand Billy if he found himself repulsive, even though Steve didn’t share that opinion. “Gandalf the Grey? Lord of the Rings? Dude...? I’m not a big reader either, but how could Lord of the Rings have passed you by?” He shrugged with a grin. “I got a B in biology... my grades weren’t that bad overall... after all, I was supposed to become something really great and the girls helped me.. somehow.” He gritted his teeth briefly and shrugged. When Billy spoke, he looked him in the eyes, just for a moment, then fixed his gaze on the glass that was now almost empty in front of him. “Because I prefer to talk about it... all the time. Because I pretend I’m actually looking for that kind of fun all the time. Everyone rolls their eyes as soon as I even mention the words ‘girls’ and ‘boobs.’” He smiled weakly. “But that used to be really important to me... today I don’t know where to find that fun, or whether it’s even appropriate. Everything is pretty confusing. Every thought feels kind of... forbidden.” He didn’t explain exactly what he meant by that. What would people think of Steve ‘the King’ Harrington if he looked at men as well as women? That he couldn’t get enough? That he only thought about one thing and left nothing out? Or... that there was something wrong with him? He stood up and grabbed the darts with the blue flags. Almost automatically, he briefly supported Billy, because he thought the blond was swaying a little. Then he narrowed his eyes and landed a pretty good first hit. “Lucky in games... unlucky in love, eh?” He joked and handed Billy the blue darts, their hands brushing briefly. Gah... that felt weird, but Steve convinced himself it was because Billy’s hands were cold..ice cold. “The thing with your dad...” He didn’t really want to bring it up again, but Steve was known for saying whatever was on his mind. “I’d help you if it meant getting back at him... what he did to you and your sister shouldn’t go unpunished. It’s not fair that good people have to suffer while assholes get away with everything.” Shaking his head, he put a finger to Billy’s lips and said in a reproachful tone, “Shh... yep, you were an asshole too... maybe you still are sometimes... but dude... your fucking karma account has been cleared for at least five more lifetimes. You can believe me on that.” |
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| Billy tensed up and glanced around the bar for a second when Steve talked about the monster stuff again. It was different when they were at home, outside, or even in a hospital room with no one to eavesdrop on them except for Max; But a bar was full of people at this time of day, and Billy was not too fond of others picking up on their topics. That's why, for now, he only nodded and let out a little hum of approval.
"Fine, alright, I've heard of it, but how would I know the characters? You're spending too much time with the nerds, dude." Whoops.That came off as much more snappy than Billy had intended. He rolled his eyes — more so at himself than at Steve — and sighed, running his hand through his tangles. "Sorry, I didn't mean... Forget it." He drank from his water again, making a face at how boring and bland it tasted. Still, it was better than the sting of regret he felt for being an asshole, even if he stopped himself in time before getting lost in it. "Biology was like the only subject I did good in. Well, except for P.E. ... I had trouble learning how to read when I got into school. Turned out I'm dyslexic. My dad was really not happy with that, thought it had to do with me being dumb and lazy. My mom didn't. She'd take me to the library twice a week to practise reading with me. At some point, I would pick really advanced anatomy books because they were full of really difficult words, and it actually helped. I got so into it, it was stupid. Told my dad I wanted to become a doctor, and he laughed at me about it. So I dropped that idea and stopped caring about school. The memory came back when I did my lifeguard training at the pool. Y'know, because of first aid and all that. Don't even know why I'm telling you this, but... I guess you don't have to become something really great. That's bullshit. Sometimes you're just not made for that stuff. And with Hawkins on lockdown, well... there's not much you can do anyway." Billy turned towards him more and listened attentively again. Somehow, that weak smile Steve made was kind of... getting to him. Perhaps because a part of him understood where it came from. "So you're... scared of what you really want, is that it?" he asked quietly, only for Steve to hear, while locking eyes with the guy. "Whatever's going on around here right now... Nothing you could want for yourself is forbidden, Harrington. Nothing. Not even the stuff you might think is... shameful. Who cares what people think? And honestly... if they don't know... they can't think crap about it, either." Billy's look into his eyes lingered for a moment before finally standing up. He didn't expect Steve to support his weight on the way, and although he tried to act like he didn't need any help, he internally agreed that it was a good call. Thankfully, the stars in his vision disappeared right away, along with the brief dizziness. Then, he watched with anticipation while Steve threw his first dart at the target, and cheered him on when he landed a damn good hit. "Yes! That's what I'm talking about, Harrington! There we go... Don't worry about luck in love, man. It's gonna be fine. You're a great guy, Steve. Fuck whoever thinks differently. Figure out what you want first, be certain and secure with it, and then it's all gonna work out. You'll see." Steve's hand was nice and warm when their fingers brushed against each other. It wasn't until then that Billy realized how cold his own skin was, which was strange, because there have been moments since they were here that he could feel a hot wave washing over his entire body. It was... quite a sensation, actually. Billy took the darts and got into position, squinting his eyes as well and trying to get a feel for the weight of the darts before throwing the first one. He felt confident about it... until Steve started talking about his dad. The first dart missed the target entirely, and Billy grumbled slightly. Before he could find the words, however, Steve suddenly pressed his finger to his lips, rendering him unable to speak anyway. Taken aback at first, Billy stared down at it, then felt his mouth curling into a grin he wasn't able to fight off. He confirmed to himself again that Steve's hand was quite warm when he took it to softly move it away from his lips. "I believe you," he uttered, the smirk lasting for two more seconds before Billy let go of his hand. There were people here. Too many people, he found. "It's, uh... It's fine, really. As long as my dad doesn't show up out of nowhere, you don't have to do anything. I'm just glad he's gone. Doesn't deserve our attention. Also," Billy looked down while leaning in a little bit and whispered, "Don't talk about the, um... the monsters or the other side here. I'm not supposed to talk about it to anyone, so..." Remaining close just like that, Billy only turned his head towards the target and threw his second dart. This time, it landed pretty close to Steve's first hit, prompting another wide grin out of him. "What are your parents like, anyway?" |
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| “So first of all, before we go any further, Hargrove… you’ve apologized a total of 35 times in the last few days. I’ve been keeping count. You don’t have to, I’m not some stupid wimp who backs down just because you let your emotions out or hit the wrong note. I know you want to do better somehow… and I appreciate getting to know the real Billy. But with me, you don’t have to turn one hundred eighty degrees. Don’t put yourself under pressure. Be who you want to be, say what you think. If I don’t like something, I’ll open my mouth, deal? Besides… holy moly, if I apologized for every poorly chosen or misunderstood word, there wouldn’t be any conversation at all.”
Steve wanted to get to know the new Billy, or rather the one who had always been there but had never really been allowed to show himself. But he also didn’t want the blond to struggle just to present that side if he was still clinging to his rebellious, asshole self. He himself had gone through a transformation once. If you projected his life onto a TV series, it would probably take someone like him about two seasons to slowly improve, to reflect, to realize that he’d once been a bullying, self-absorbed asshole. What Billy told him next made Steve stare at him in silence for a moment. Wow. Just… wow? Honestly, he would’ve sooner believed Billy wanted to become a porn actor, sorry not sorry or drift into the criminal corner. Mafia boss, drug dealer... maybe something even bigger. And then it hit him how deeply he’d bought into clichés. It was frightening, the kind of judgments you make when you don’t really know someone. “Hey, Billy… just because school sucked doesn’t mean you’re going to suck. Bill Gates dropped out of Harvard, and this year Microsoft went public. Steve Jobs dropped out of college, built Apple, and the Macintosh has been all the rage since ’84. Or Richard Branson… school dropout.. founded Virgin. And if you’re aiming more for ‘cool’, Travolta dropped out at sixteen and still became a fucking superstar. A bad report card isn’t a verdict, and neither are your shortcomings. The only thing I’ll agree with you on is that we’re stuck here right now, and no matter what we do here… if we survive, we’ll have to start from scratch. Probably without support or help. Just from scratch, while people keep asking why our fucking résumé has so many gaps.” It was always easier for him to encourage others than to talk about himself. Maybe that was why he wrapped his own life in sarcasm and humor. He didn’t take himself very seriously anymore. “Well… you have to be afraid of something, right? And I’m afraid that if I live out what… doesn’t really do anyone any good right now, except maybe me… everything will fall apart and I’ll lose focus. While I was sleeping with Nancy for the first time… Barb died.” It was probably trauma, every time he gave himself over to something natural, even beautiful, something terrible seemed to happen. So what would happen if Steve took that final step toward self-discovery? Billy was right, though, and his words didn’t leave Steve untouched. They made him think.. he just didn’t yet know what about, because he didn’t even dare name it in his tangled thoughts. The game of darts came at the right moment, a chance to switch off a little, even if Harrington, of course, had another unpleasant topic ready. He nodded several times, understanding, he understood that Billy didn’t want to give his father any importance right now. And he understood that the monsters shouldn’t be mentioned here. “Okay… to both. I’ll try... and instead of monsters I’ll just say… schnitzel… in case it slips out. With the boys, we’ve got a whole set of codes for that too…” This time he whispered it, close to Billy’s ear. Billy’s second throw was dangerously good, and even if the first one had missed… maybe Steve could distract him, because.. he wanted to win. “They’re fine.. I guess. Dad’s always working, Mom’s… busy. Trips and charity stuff. Whatever... house is usually empty, which is kind of the point, I guess. They give me the car, the credit card. But..they weren’t always gone, used to be around more, back when I was a kid. Wasn’t… better. My dad, well… not that different from yours. Sooo… them being gone.. actually works for me.” He threw his next two darts, not terrible... but not great either. When it was Billy’s turn again, Steve stepped closer, waiting for the moment when the other guy was fully focused. “If you miss this one, just say it was me. I mean… who can aim calmly with someone standing that close behind them? I certainly couldn’t. So don’t worry. Really don’t worry. Some things just feel better from behind when you’re not pretending to be cold, especially when you’re supposed to be holding still.” He watched Billy closely and, this time, used the ambiguity on purpose. Carefully enough not to give himself away completely… and still leave room for excuses later. |
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| When Steve held his speech about Billy apologizing too much, Billy froze in his stance and listened with a very hesitant expression; Face down, only eyes glancing up at the guy, like he was going to hit him in the nose if he spotted the discomfort of being called out on his face. Usually, Billy was not the type to apologize earnestly at all. If anything, a "sorry" was used to appease his father when he'd fucked something up. Anything else was an admission of true guilt, of wanting to be better but horribly failing, of being utterly vulnerable. It always hurt way too much, stopped him from being in touch with his core. Billy had said sorry to Max when he was sure he was dying. Not just for his part in the Mind Flayer's atrocious acts, but for everything else he had put her through, simply due to his fear of being truly seen.
But Steve was not his father. He didn't have to appease him for any fuck-ups. Billy relaxed again, his eyes finally softening as he looked at him. It hurt so much to suddenly care about saying the right thing. The pain was as unstoppable as the biggest ocean waves that had knocked him over while he still learned how to surf as a boy. But over time, he could ride the waves, control them, live with them like they are meant to shake him. Perhaps... Billy could learn how to ride the emotional ocean waves, too. And around Steve, it seemed... possible. There was something so unconditional about how he accepted Billy's nature, and somehow, he was moved by how Steve wanted to know the real him. No one ever did. As much as saying sorry had been a problem, saying "thank you" was even worse, still. So instead of speaking the words, Billy nodded at him, a shadow of deep acknowledgement and soft appreciation in his hues. It only lasted for one or two seconds, but it was there nonetheless. "Yeah, I guess we'll see what we're gonna do with our lives. I don't know yet. It feels... kinda weird to think about the future after I was sure that I was... not having one." When Steve revealed the truth of his and Nancy's first night together, Billy took a breath and arched his eyebrows, growing silent for a moment. It made complete sense, and he halted at how relatable that felt. He never knew Barb because his family hadn't moved to Hawkins until after she was killed, but he remembered that the school had a huge whiteboard dedicated to her in the hallways. In all honesty, Billy never truly cared about it, because he was occupied with tons of other bullshit at the time. That was until he knew what kind of fucked up crap was going on in this town. "I see..." he uttered and nodded, pursing his lips. "I get it, man. I do. Y'know... The night I was... taken... and possessed by that thing," Billy whispered, careful to keep his voice down, "I was actually on my way to meet... someone. A girl. Was gonna be on a date, sort of... Never made it there. Sometimes I wonder what would be different if... I hadn't asked out that girl." Billy bit his lip when he talked about it. He couldn't possibly tell him who he was going to meet that night, but he supposed it didn't matter because Karen was never going to show up, anyways. Later, the mention of "schnitzel" as a code word for the monsters made him grin again. He liked the sensation of Steve's voice brushing against his ear as he whispered into it. But when Steve talked about his parents, Billy had to pause and look at him again. The idea that his dad was just as bad had him hold his breath for a second. Having lived with his own was bad enough; He could only imagine what Steve had gone through with his own on that notion. "Shit, man... Good for you he's not showing his face around here," he said with a somewhat awkward pat on the guy's back. With how patient and kind and helpful Steve was, Billy could have never guessed that he, too, had grown up with the awful kind of father. A part of him was glad that Steve didn't turn out like himself, but another part of him felt a sense of dread about it. How weak was he if everyone else could deal with it better than he could? Billy took some deep breaths before taking his position in front of the target again, squinting as he aimed his first dart. Just as he was able to focus again, however, his new friend attempted to steal all of his attention with his pretty voice close to his ear. He could feel his warmth on his skin, even almost through the layers of his clothes. Or perhaps, it was just himself heating up due to the pretty company. Promptly, Billy stopped aiming, lowered his hand with the dart, and turned his head to look at him. Slowly but surely, he started smirking, and his blue eyes took just a little glimpse at Steve's beautifully plump lips before locking their gazes again. "... I know what you're doing. Are you trying to fuck with me?" he challenged, then realized his mistake and looked down for a moment, a hint of embarrassment in the shadow of his smile. Only then — and only because he was so pale these days — it became clearly visible; Billy Hargrove's cheeks flushed a deep shade of red. He blushed. He really, actually blushed. "I—I don't mean like that, I mean..." Billy chuckled, then pursed his lips. He wasn't usually shaken in that way, especially when it came to ambiguity and flirting, and yet, there it was, as clear as the still water in his glass; Billy was mirroring Steve for a moment. And he didn't even intend to do so. "You're having a bad influence on me, Steve Harrington..." His grin widened. Billy gazed into Steve's pretty brown eyes for a moment longer, and then, without even looking at the target, he threw his first dart. It landed right in the middle. "... but you can't beat me when I'm in my element, especially when you pull me into it," he murmured, winking at him. |
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| “If we stopped thinking about the future… then Vecna would’ve made it. Henry, or whatever all this bullshit is about, would’ve already done it, wouldn’t he? Then we’d already be dead inside too… and then I’d wonder why we don’t all just meet at my place, fill our bellies, drink… and wait until we all just fizzle out and dissolve into nothingness. I don’t see that happening. I just spent seventy-eight dollars on my new haircut the other day…”
A hairstyle that looked exactly as it always did on Steve...lots of thick, hazel hair, tousled, voluminous, and a little longer. The fact that Billy was different didn’t escape him. He was getting to know a young man here that he definitely hadn’t met like this before. It was almost as if he were meeting a complete stranger… and yet, on the other hand, he was Billy. Billy Hargrove. A cheeky, self-confident sunny boy who was a bit unsteady on his feet at the moment. “Don’t you think… it would’ve been your fate either way?” Thoughtfully, he tapped a finger against his lips. Billy had been the perfect food for the Mind Flayer, a broken guy full of rage, easy to control. Maybe that idiotic, filthy creature would’ve waited until it got its hands on him… or maybe it had already been hot on Billy’s heels. “I don’t know… right now I hardly believe in coincidences anymore. Everything that’s happening just feels far too planned… far too structured. Do you know what I mean? But… if you hadn’t tried to meet her…” There were so many damn ideas running through his head, so many what ifs. But he didn’t want to say any of them right now. It was irrelevant, what had happened had happened, and it couldn’t be undone. Unless Dustin invented a flux capacitor and they could all travel back in time together… but that, well, was fiction. Still, Harrington was surprised that Billy didn’t make fun of his night with Nancy. It wouldn’t have been appropriate, but the old Billy wouldn’t have cared. Fascinating, this… new guy. The topic of fathers, apparently not so dissimilar, came up, but Steve, as usual, put on a good face and played it off. “I think… this parenting thing is definitely important when you’re growing up. But then again, our parents failed. I’ll get my moment to tell my dad what’s on my mind… but even that feels so damn unimportant right now, don’t you think?” Playing darts together loosened the last knot, and Steve unconsciously slipped into something he’d once been pretty good at… flirting. They were close. So damn close.. the faces, the bodies… everything. The distance seemed to melt away, and for once Steve didn’t flinch. He stood his ground, allowed the closeness, didn’t feel weird about it. A broad grin spread across his face as he shrugged. “Do I want to fuck with.. you? Well… are you familiar with it? I don’t.. no idea how that’s supposed to work. But if you mean, do I want to fuck with you? No... not taking the piss, I’m just trying to distract you...and it’s working brilliantly…” His grin widened. Only a few seconds later, when he fully registered what he’d said, did his eyes widen too. He cleared his throat quietly. Maybe he was… a little embarrassed. But when the dart hit the target, he puffed out his chest. “Pulling you in... bullshit. That was a lucky shot. I might be shit with firearms, but darts and pool.. I’m unbeatable, Hargrove. And I say that was pure luck.” |
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| Billy would have loved for this to go on for hours and hours to come. To indulge and forget, be normal, laugh, learn to talk about what mattered; And even though he wasn't going to get drunk on plain tap water, he liked the thought of getting drunk from Steve's laugh and the ambiguous jokes alone. He was getting to know the guy in a whole new way, and it was more intriguing than he could have imagined.
Unfortunately, the universe had other plans. The doors of the bar were pushed open, almost knocking off the bells, and two pairs of heavy boots echoed through the bar in spite of the loud music. Eagerly, they stepped towards the two. Billy tensed up when two soldiers towered over them, blocking out the ceiling light and encasing them in sudden, claustrophobic darkness. Both of them carried machine guns on their backs and rendered the entire bar silent. Even the music was turned down. Everyone stared at them, and then at Billy and Steve. "William Hargrove?" one of the soldiers barked. Billy froze completely still, staring up at them like a deer in headlights. "Yeees...?" "Dr. Kay wants to see you." Billy frowned, swallowing. "I... have an appointment with her next week." "I should have been more clear. She wants to see you now. Come with us, please." "What?! On a saturday night, are you kidding me? What for?" Billy snarled. The soldier sighed. "You can discuss this with her when we get there, Mr. Hargrove." But all Billy did was scoff at them. "I'm not gonna do shit. Can't I just call her tomorrow or something if it's so important?" The soldiers shared a look, then the other leaned in closer, keeping his deep and threatening voice low. "We can either take this outside, or keep it right in here. Your choice. I doubt you want us to arrest you with all of these people, and your friend here, watching." Billy glared up at him, nose flared as he growled. "I did nothing wrong." "You were not supposed to change your residence without alerting Dr. Kay of your whereabouts." Billy scrunched up his face and shook his head in complete disbelief. "Oh, am I your fucking lab rat now, is that it?!" "Final warning!" the second soldier bellowed, pushing into Billy's personal space until he hit the pool table with his back. "Come with us or we'll arrest you, and it won't be fucking pretty, alright?!" Billy's entire demeanor changed in that moment. He dropped his defensive walls and stared up at him, eyes widened, his chest quaking as his breaths hitched. "O...Okay, okay, alright, I—I'll come with you. No need to make a big deal out of it," he uttered. 
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| He was still grumbling to himself when the situation shifted abruptly. Heavy footsteps. Stares from everyone around them. Then the clumsy volley of orders from soldiers who thought they had something to say. At first, Steve stayed silent, mouth slightly open as he watched it unfold. But when one of them stepped closer to Billy and started raining down imperious, threatening gestures, Steve finally moved, slipping between them and clicking his tongue.
“Guys. Guys.. hey. Wow, wow... all good... easy. Everyone in this bar now knows you’ve got big fucking balls. But you know, there was a time when the word no still meant something…” Behind his back, he kept nudging Billy, trying to pull him out of his stupor, to make him feel that he was here. That he wasn’t alone. That they could fight this together. “Steve Charrington… the guy who has to stick his nose in everywhere. Mommy’s favorite, huh... you don’t seem to be learning your lesson… kid.” One of the other soldiers grinned as he said it. “We can take you both with us. If Billy behaves, he can even visit you in your cell…” Steve exhaled, unimpressed, and shook his head. “You must have a very important, very official letter with you that gives you permission to take Billy against his will, right?” The soldiers laughed. “Pandemic, Charrington. Theater of war... different laws apply here, smartass.” Steve glanced at Billy, really looked at him, then smiled again and let out a long, exaggerated sigh. “Yes.. I am stupid.. of course.... I should’ve known. Man… my upbringing really left something to be desired. Soldiers’ balls, never to be questioned... you’re right. Even if you look pretty stupid trying to be.” BAM. A fist slammed into Steve’s face. Blood burst from his nose, but instead of recoiling, he laughed. A wonderful déjà vu... Steve Harrington was used to getting punched. “Ooooookay… Hargrove and I are gonna take a piss. Then you can take us with you. And don’t worry, there are no windows in the bathroom.” The soldiers grabbed both of them by the arms, shoved them toward the restroom, made sure Steve hadn’t lied… then left them alone for the moment. “We’re agreed you’re not just going to go, right?” Steve muttered. “This is a no-return ticket, Billy... we need a plan...and fast.” He pulled a radio from his jacket, switched it on, and whispered. “Henderson… Henderson, can you hear me? Fuck...DUSTIN.” A soft crackle answered. “Steve? Do you know what time it is?” Steve wiped the blood on his sleeve and clenched his jaw. “Code: Intergalactic Thunder Gurgler.” Which meant: we’re fucked, stupid situation, soldiers, danger...help. |
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| The very second Steve stepped between him and the soldier, Billy grasped the back of Steve's shirt fiercely, holding onto him for dear life. It wasn't conscious or planned. It simply happened, like his fear took control of his limbs.
"Steve, stop. Stop it, shut up!" he whispered to him, but urgently. "Stop arguing!" But there was no use; Steve was completely lost in his tantrum in his attempt to protect him, while Billy was trying desperately to do the same for him but horribly failing. What made him hold his breath was the fact that these two soldiers knew who Steve was, his stomach twisting and turning into knots at the thought that he could get in trouble because of him. When they locked at each other for a second, Billy shook his head at him, begging him with his eyes to just stop already, but then— "STEVE!" A fist met his friend's nose and Billy swore he could hear a wet crack upon the impact. However, before he had a chance to see if he was alright, Steve just... laughed, actually laughed, and frankly, it sent a cold shiver down his spine. That was not the same guy that Billy had beaten up into unconsciousness so long ago. That was someone who took a beating like a champ after all those times he was needlessly targeted. Next thing he knew, the soldiers pushed both of them into the bathroom, and Billy started pacing around with unease. "Are you fucking kidding me? What were you thinking, provoking them like that!" His friend then pulled a god damn radio out of nowhere, probably his ass, and started calling Henderson. "Oh, no no no, absolutely fucking not," Billy snapped, stormed towards Steve and snatched the radio out of his hands before pushing the button. "Henderson, this is Billy. Forget about what he just said, he's drunk. Go back to bed, there's no intergalactic... thunder... whatever thing going on, alright?" He proceeded to pop the batteries out of the radio, shaking his head profusely. "We need to hide this thing. You are not dragging the kids into this crap, Harrington! There's not going to be a fucking plan! You're going to let me go with them, do you understand? This— This military doctor bitch, Dr. Kay, she— she examines me once a week, takes some blood, checks my organ values, takes photos of my scars and puts weird electrodes on my head or something, but she always lets me go afterwards! I don't know why she wants to see me now when I've already been there this week! She said it's all to check if I still have... traces of that shadow thing in me or whatever. But I fucked up, I—I was supposed to stay in the gym or at least tell them when I stay somewhere else, and now... Shit, I don't trust them as far as I can spit, I don't know what the fuck they are examining me for, but they know who you are, Steve! They know you!" He brought his hands to his face, running his fingers through his hair. Then, he stepped closer to Steve, staring into his eyes with a deep frown. "These guys are not to be reckoned with. I don't know what they are gonna do to you or—or Max, or anyone, if you provoke them in my name! They're gonna watch you now, do you understand? They are gonna bug your house, and they'll follow you and the others around to make sure you're not fucking them up! And if they find out that you know more than they do," he lamented, briefly keeping his voice down at that part, "they will— I don't know what they will do! But once they got you, they're never gonna leave you alone! Do you get it?!" Billy took another step closer, grabbing his shoulders. The look in his eyes became more pleading by the second. "Right now, they just think you're being an idiot who sticks his nose where it's not wanted, but if they take you with them... I don't know what will happen to you. Or to me. So you're gonna let me go with them, and you will wait until I come back home, got it? You won't call anyone, least of all the kids! As long as I play along, they have no reason to use you against me..." His cold hands moved up towards Steve's face, his fingers softly feeling the bruises that were starting to bloom underneath his eyes. "Fuck... You god damn idiot, are you alright?" |
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 AI GENERATED BY FABULOUS KILLJOY
“What do you mean, provoke them? Am I supposed to let them play God just because they’ve got some fucking weapons strapped to their bodies and think they have something to say? That’s bullshit, Billy…” He grumbled to himself, first wrestling for the radio, but Bill was quicker. Completely dumbfounded, Steve stared at every single battery that had been removed from the device and shook his head in disbelief. “Dude… have you ever tried to deal with batteries in an emergency? That’s… barely possible, partly because you’re full of adrenaline and your hands are shaking and.. hey… Henderson knows I’d never use the code if I didn’t think someone was in danger… pff… drunk, pff… he won’t believe that either.” His eyes lingered on the radio for a moment longer, almost wistfully, before he let his hands drop to his sides and cleared his throat as Billy started talking about the doctor and the treatment the blond apparently was already more or less used to. “First of all… the kids.. they’re not kids anymore. Apart from the fact that they’re almost grown, their childhood ended the moment this fucking spectacle hit Hawkins… when Will was taken. They want to fight and they stand up for each other… we’re a team, and you’re part of it now… we’re not leaving anyone behind, Billy.” He made an effort to keep his voice low. So far, he was still in control, but he didn’t like what was happening, and his paranoia was so strong, his fear so all-encompassing, that he retreated fully behind his façade just to keep a grip on the situation. “Oooooh, they’re just running some tests on you… right. They’re only interested in your well-being… just checking if there’s anything left in you that they probably couldn’t see anyway with all their fucking instruments. They’re incapacitating you… controlling you… using you… and that has to stop. We all know it can get any of us, Vecna, nature itself, or soldiers. We’re already in it. They’ve been watching us since Will was gone.. Those fuckers know everything, Billy... they’re everywhere, and if they want to do something to us, they will… and not because a fucking loser like Steve Harrington jokes about their balls. They get orders.” He clenched his teeth. The fear of losing another one of them was too much. Steve couldn’t think rationally in that moment, how could he? He had to keep Billy alive… for Max. Of course. For Max. “I’m not important… they don’t want me. I don’t even work as leverage, BK, you’re right, I’m the idiot in this squad… but they don’t want me. They want you, Will… Eleven…” Billy’s cold hands against his skin triggered something, something that finally made Steve fall silent. It wasn’t a real anchor, not really, but it was enough to calm him down. “I’m all right,” he murmured softly, resignation bleeding into his will to fight. “And that’s your plan now…? Play along? I’m supposed to let you go with them and just hope they don’t hurt you, yes? You know, Billy… all this talk about the future is built on hope, but what am I supposed to hope for when, one by one, my team... gets taken out of the game and all I can do is stand there and wonder afterward what I could’ve done differently…” He carefully took Billy’s wrists in both hands and guided them down. “Fuck you, Hargrove… we’ll do it your way. But you can’t stop me. and the others, from getting you out of there. I’m not gonna twiddle my thumbs. I’m not gonna twiddle my thumbs. You’re Billy Hargrove. You’re a person in your own right, not an experiment or state property… you hear me?” He kicked the bathroom door hard with one foot. “Okay, Hargrove… then go get your care package…” Steve raised his voice this time, loud enough for the soldiers to hear, making sure it sounded as defiant as possible.... a bit of theater, just to sell it. “Your turn…” He whispered close to Billy’s ear. “Bring old Billy back... so old Steve can remember he’s an idiot… and once you’re in their clutches, leave the rest to me.”  GIF MADE BY FABULOUS KILLJOY
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| Billy shook his head continuously like clockwork while he put the radio and the batteries away, hiding it behind a toilet stall. Then, he could say nothing while Steve lamented and complained, only stare at him and fumble with words, with fear, with loss of control. He hated that Steve got hurt, that Henderson was getting dragged into this, that Steve insisted upon the kids not being kids anymore, that he had to do whatever this Dr. Kay wanted, whenever she wanted. He hated that Steve was probably right, and that it scared him like nothing else. But what he hated most was that he couldn't understand why his new friend would do something as foolish as risking worse consequences than a broken nose... for him, of all people.
And then, Steve laid it out on the table for him. The answer was clear, simple, and impossible to misunderstand. We’re a team, and you’re part of it now… we’re not leaving anyone behind, Billy. He held his breath so hard it hurt, and his blue, wet eyes stared into Steve's with trembling intensity, only remembering how to draw in air when Steve calmed down and told him he was alright. His skin was warm underneath his fingers, and it was like he could feel the softening of his face when his friend fell into resignation. The truth was that he didn't really care what Dr. Kay was doing to him. It was always just two hours of absolute humiliation, but that was it, and he wanted to forget about it as soon as possible when he got out of there. Once he'd get home, back to the Harrington house, Billy would feel normal again. And something told him that it wasn't just the house allowing him to feel at ease. Yes, Billy got a new chance, and yes, starting a new life felt accomplishable, just because Steve was the one who opened his doors to him. But the darkness was still always there, right inside of him. It still had its cold grasp upon his being, like the Mind Flayer's spiky tentacles that had been pinning him down that fateful night. He still wouldn't eat some days because he just didn't care enough. He still avoided running into the others like a god damn coward. He still threw old photos away that he used to love, just because it hurt too much to look at them. He still couldn't stand seeing Max in the hospital some days, even though he'd promised to come every day. It was too draining to force himself out of bed and work on himself yet, and it felt so, so heavy just to think about it. "Steve, I'm... I'm not... worth it," Billy whispered lowly, shaking his head again. But seeing Steve Harrington care about not losing another part of his team, seeing him so distraught and almost in panic... Suddenly, Billy didn't feel quite so cold anymore. His heart was beating heavier, but stronger. His body felt dreadful, but energized. And maybe, that's what Kay was doing: Shoving him into situations of utter humiliation to keep him low and controllable. If someone whose life he'd made hell — someone he had almost beaten to death in a fit of stupid rage — threw a tantrum over his wellbeing... Then, maybe, Billy had permission to care about himself more, too. He could be worth it at last. Steve lowered his hands, and the touch alone seemed to fuel the strength he thought he'd lost along the way. Then, the guy kicked the door to alert the soldiers and whispered something into his ear. Billy locked eyes with him considerably and swallowed, then nodded. "Wait for me, first. Two hours at least. And if I don't come back, then... give 'em hell for me." The soldiers barged in, and Billy stepped in front of them with raised hands right away. "Alright, alright, I'll come with you as promised, but leave my friend alone. He's had a couple of drinks and was just being an idiot. I won't cause trouble. Please... I won't resist." The soldiers rolled eyes at each other. While one of them pushed Steve aside, the other pulled Billy forward to guide him out of the bar. One last time, Billy looked back at Steve, mouthing the words 'two hours' to him with expressive urgency. The soldier pushed him forward again when he noticed, and as soon as all three of them walked through the doors, the music was turned back up like nothing ever happened. |
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| END OF TAPE
NEXT CHAPTER: ALMOST A RESCUE → Driven by desperation, Steve makes a choice he can’t take back: he calls for help to get Billy out of the military’s grip, throwing caution, his own safety — and the safety of his friends — into the wind. Every risk, every potential consequence fades in the face of what matters most. For Steve, there is no plan B, no pause, only the single, urgent goal of bringing Billy home. Meanwhile, Major General Dr. Kay examines Billy’s condition with a precision that feels almost clinical... Her fascination with him runs deeper than concern, darker than curiosity. And soon enough, every measured glance, every probing question hints at intentions far more sinister than anyone realizes.  (c) HEADER MADE BY FABULOUS KILLJOY
PLEASE REWIND AFTER WATCHING |
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